We Might Not Get Tomorrow
by Paul is all mine ladies
Summary: "We might not get tomorrow" I breathed as Paul pulled me into a tight embrace. Bella Swan, daughter to Charles Swan, Charles Swan, married to the military. Endangered every day of her life Bella learnt to cope, but when her dad dies on a mission she might just be safe.. until the unfinished mission's leader comes knocking "But we have today" Paul breathed just as desperately as me.
1. La Push

**Prologue - Bella's Pov**

"We're moving." The words echoed around in my head hollowly, I thought we were past this, I was older and dad was getting older. I set the knife I was using to cut the onions up down and wiped my hands on the tea towel.

"When?" I asked with a dry mouth, my thoughts disconnected and my vision blurry

"Sunday, to Paris… I am being deployed for a mission there."

"You have only been off for two days and you spent them _doing _work." I muttered

"I know," He nodded "But this mission is times sensitive."

"I want to stay here." I said setting my jaw

He gave me a long look, his military issue hair cut was freshly cut but it was also looking incredibly grey and his face was creased with numerous wrinkles. I realised with a pang that dad _was _old now. He pulled his sunglasses off and his eyes were a dull blue, not their usual colour.

"I will make the arrangements, then," He said looking shaken and a bit upset under his cool exterior "… Are you sure you want to do this, I mean we haven't been to Paris yet?"

I sighed "I don't want to leave you, dad, but school just got busier and if I move now I don't know if I can keep up with all the different curriculum, the language… moving, all of it."

"Alright then," He nodded, hugging me "But you have to come to the base for training in December, remember."

"I will." I sniffed, I loved training and it was usually around the time that parents like mine came back from deployment.

"I'm sorry," He whispered, his cheek resting on my head "I know this has been hard for you since…"

"Don't be," I cut him off "I know you love your job and that is important for you but now I am older… I need to start thinking about what is good for me and my future."

He nodded and walked over to the phone and started making arrangement while I felt my world spiral out of control. I _never ever _told my dad no, I always did what they… he wanted and I much less expected him to let me say _no_…

I looked out the window and sniffed, the cool air was messing with my nose, all the green was making my eyes hurt. My plane had gotten in not long ago and I was on my way to my new home till dad got back about two years from now probably. I looked across at Emily and eyed her carefully, she was my dad's friend Josh's, son's fiancé so I had never met her and I hadn't seen Sam since I was... eight years old I don't think. She looked at me and I returned her look before I turned my head and went back to looking out the window.

"How are you liking La Push so far?" She asked not wavering her gaze from the road

"Well enough." I shrugged, not feeling particularly chatty

"Don't worry," she snorted "It took me a while to get used to the greenness of it… but after while it gets better."

"You aren't from here?" I asked eyeing her again

"No," She answered "From another Reservation… it was a big decision to move here before I married Sam."

I didn't know what to say so I didn't say anything, but I didn't have to worry about that because as we pulled up in a driveway that was now deemed my how I heard laughter and yelling. It appeared that there was a game of football was being played at the house, shirts and skins. I marveled at their impeccable form. Now I had grown up in army and naval bases around the world so I had seen my fair share of ripped and muscled navy seals etc but they were just as good if not better than them. She chuckled looking at my stunned face and said;

"Don't worry, you get used to those monkeys running around with no clothes on too."

_'I hope not.' _I thought to myself amusedly as I watched them pause and look at Emily's car as we climbed out. I found my eyes scanning over them all, trying to work out with one was Sam, I frowned as I looked at one, I think it was him, his face looked the same, just older looking. I felt my broad shoulders slouch forward, they always did that when I was unsure or nervous about something.

"I'm going to get my stuff." I mumbled, turning and walking towards the boot and pulling it opened

I was surprised when I saw a tan hand reach in next to mine and grab my large suitcase, pulling it out with ease it seemed. I looked up and asked quietly;

"Sam?"

"How are you going, Boo?"

I smiled, I hadn't been called that in years. I grabbed my smaller cases and followed Sam inside, ignoring the bunch of boys that were staring at me as I walked inside. I followed him to my new room and he set the case down gently, I looked around and nodded once. I noticed that he was looking at my black case, I knew he knew what it was and he asked quietly.

"He's still in the squad then?"

I nodded before I answered "It's just a precaution… I won't take them out unless I'm or you guys are in danger."

"He said you have to go away in December… does it have to do with…"

"Yes, we can't tell you more for your safety." I muttered out of reflex, it wasn't exactly true but sometimes it was easier to just not tell the complete truth

"I will leave you to get settled in then." Sam nodded and headed for the door

"Wait Sam!" I said quickly, he turned around with a raised eyebrow "I mean… are you okay with this, if you aren't then that's fine… I have lived by myself before it is no big deal, I don't want to put you out."

He chuckled "It's fine… I mean what are family friends for when we are all we have left pretty much."

I nodded and smiled as he walked out closing the door behind him quietly. I let out a sigh and felt a pang, I missed dad…

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><p><strong>Alrighty! This has been playing around in my mind for a while so I thought why the hell not and post it, so I did. I don't own anything except for my plot. Please review with any questions or feed back please so I can better my writing.<strong>


	2. Harsh Realizations

_**Previously**_

_"Wait Sam!" I said quickly, he turned around with a raised eyebrow "I mean… are you okay with this, if you aren't then that's fine… I have lived by myself before it is no big deal, I don't want to put you out."_

_He chuckled "It's fine… I mean what are family friends for when we are all we have left pretty much."_

_I nodded and smiled as he walked out closing the door behind him quietly. I let out a sigh and felt a pang, I missed dad…_

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><p>A few weeks had passed and I found that I slipped seamlessly into Sam and Emily's life, I went to school on the reservation so I had some of the guys with me pretty much all the time but I felt myself getting restless, itching to open my black case. I couldn't afford to get out of practise, it could kill me. It was Saturday, 6am to be exact. I bounded out to the kitchen surprised to see it empty… that was unusual in the extreme. The boys were at Emily and Sam's all hours of the day and night… it was strange if you ask me and I knew they were hiding something but I knew they would tell me in their own time. I sat down in a chair at the table and stared at the phone, waiting for dad to call me, we had an agreement. Every two weeks he would call me on the Saturday, at 6am. Time trickled by, my eyes darting back to the clock every other minute and soon enough it was seven, my heart sank and twisted a little. I couldn't afford to get upset, he might just have gotten held up or compromised, I couldn't…<p>

Paul walked in and gave me a look before he just pulled me into a hug, Paul and I had gotten close, he was my best friend it was fair to say. He had been there since I moved and _demanded _that I become his friend, the guys said Paul was an asshole before I came but… I just couldn't see it. Sure he did have his problems but I mean who didn't? His dad left him and his mother when he was little and came back before he left again, they haven't seen him since. He was a mummy's boy, he absolutely adored him mother, he would go the end of the world for her. The guys gave him hell about it but… he didn't care, he just shrugged it off and smiled. I snuggled into his grasp and let a light sob out, his low bass voice rasped out;

"What's wrong?"

"Dad didn't call and it's seven." I whispered pressing my face into his bare shoulder

He made a low clucking noise in his throat and folded me up in his embrace and I felt like I could disappear, I wanted to. I knew this day was coming… I shouldn't have kidded myself into thinking it would have been okay… deep down I knew it wouldn't be. I was just staring numbly at Paul when his ears twitched. He stood, taking me with him, and walked in the direction of my room, plonking me and him down on my large bed. I don't know how I fell asleep but somehow I managed with Paul cradling me in his tight grasp, I realised with a jolt that this is where I will probably be spending the rest of my teenage life. With dad… gone… Sam signed papers to say that he was guardian until dad got back to sign the papers again the relieve Sam of his 'Guardian duties'. I woke a while later and looked across to see Paul asleep still, I smiled and trailed a finger lightly over his forehead down to his cheek, pressing the palm of my hand to cheek gently before I pulled away. I pulled some decent clothes on and snagged my black case, walking out my window and to my car that was parked in the driveway.

I ignored the looks out the window and sped down the drive, kicking up gravel. On the road to Seattle I pulled up, fueled up grabbed some breakfast and kept driving until I reached where I wanted to be. The gun range was nothing fancy I noticed as I stepped out but that didn't bother me, as long as I had something to train myself with it would have to do. I trained like I had my old trainer back at the base breathing down my neck, gods I missed Adam and his abrasive attitude. I burned through so many rounds I lost count that day and when I straightened up at closing time I felt the sun burn on my face as I retrieved my shot sheets. The man at the front counter asked if he could keep my sheets and answered a simple "No." you don't display your talent when you don't know who could be watching you if you are someone like me. I peered at my sunburn and snorted I looked like a red and tan version of a panda. I wore sunglasses and where they were around my eyes they left a not burnt patch on my face but the rest of my face and arms was splashed a vicious red. It didn't bother me, I can get as badly burnt as I am now and it would be gone by morning thankfully.

I checked my phone that I had turned off and saw a ton of missed calls and texts so I quickly turned it back off, I didn't want it distracting me while I was driving home. As I cruised home, feeling more at ease with myself, my fingers no longer twitching with the need to pull a trigger I felt a… false sense of security fall over me, I knew what was coming next. I would receive a letter in the mail saying my father had been lost in battle, whether they had recovered his body yet remained to be seen, I would receive a lump sum of money from the defence force due to my father dying in battle. After that I would receive his life savings and all that stuff would be transferred to my accounts, I would receive dad's last will and testament. After that I would receive another letter that told me of my father's funeral arrangements and how he was to be remembered for his service to his country and from there I didn't know what would happen. I pulled up at Sam and Emily's once again and peered out the windscreen, it was dark out but surprisingly the sky was clear, I could see the stars. I looked down at my lap where my fingers were folded, sliding over and probing each other in a nervous habit I picked up years ago. I opened my door and stepped out, walking back through the window that opened up into my room, placing my black case down beside my bed. I looked in the mirror, redoing my hair and looking at my sunburn, it was already beginning to fade. I could hear the guys in the kitchen and living room but couldn't bring myself to go out… I just wanted to be by myself and come to terms with everything. I pulled my pj's on and settled myself into bed, my brain ticking over with everything that has happened.

I realised as a pair of violently hot arms wrapped themselves around me and pulled me closer, their weight settling down into the mattress behind me … my dad has been gone a long time, sure I still saw him but it was only a ghost of what he once was. He died all those years ago with mum when the army base was bombed, he never really came back from her death, his body just remained. I let the tears finally slip, feeling Paul's burning fingers brush them off my face as each round came. I had been on my own for so long… not just physically but mentally, I had been doing everything for myself for… well years. After this interaction finished with Paul and I, his just holding me I knew I would crave his touch, anything just to feel… normal again.

"You don't have to stay." I rasped out a while later, my voice and throat strained from the crying

"I don't think you understand," Paul murmured in my ear, his lips brushing it "I will always stay, forever or as long as you need me and want me."

"Well don't you ever leave then," I whispered back, hardly believing my own words "You hear me? Because I will always need you."

"Good," Paul whispered again, shuffling us around so I was pulled closer to him and our legs were a human pretzel, we were so close I don't even think a sheet of plastic could have been wedged between up "Because even then I don't think I would leave you."

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><p><strong>Okay chapter two is up Yay! Okay once again I don't own anything except my own characters and my plot sadly. Please review, I am looking for AT LEAST 5 before I update again so... yeah. Hope you enjoy it lots, let me know if you do. Thanks, Paul is all mine ladies.<strong>


	3. Dog Tags

**Questions asked by reviewers answered:**

**sjorty asked : So how is Sam connected? Charlie and Sam were friends in the service in his unit? -** Sam is connected by his father, Joshua Uley, Joshua was in Charlie's unit until he got injured years ago and had to retire to a different area. (Bella and Sam met when they were little). Joshua died and Sam and Charlie have kept in contact ever since, Sam isn't apart of the military.

**Lanah (Guest) asked : Does she know how to fight too? Was she trained like a soldier? - **Yes, yes she can and she was in fact trained like a soldier, some more of that will be revealed in later chapters. Sorry i can't say more otherwise it would spoil the rest of the story line.

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><p><em>Previously<em>

_"You don't have to stay." I rasped out a while later, my voice and throat strained from the crying_

_"I don't think you understand," Paul murmured in my ear, his lips brushing it "I will always stay, forever or as long as you need me and want me."_

_"Well don't you ever leave then," I whispered back, hardly believing my own words "You hear me? Because I will always need you."_

_"Good," Paul whispered again, shuffling us around so I was pulled closer to him and our legs were a human pretzel, we were so close I don't even think a sheet of plastic could have been wedged between up "Because even then I don't think I would leave you."_

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><p>I was eating breakfast with the guys, it was a Saturday one week from when dad didn't call, when Sam handed me a thick envelope and I eyed it a second before I grabbed it off him and walked to my room for some much needed privacy. I flipped it over to see who it was from and sure enough it was from HQ or what was dad's current base, I gulped, I had been expecting this. It was needless to say though that I didn't want it though. I held it for only God knows how long before I snagged a knife that I had taped to the underside of my bed, sliding the wickedly sharp blade along the paper top. My hands were shaking as I pulled the thick bundle of paper out, I grabbed the first paper and swallowed loudly, a light pant emitting from my mouth. The letter read;<p>

_To Isabella Marie Swan,_

_We regret to inform you that Charles .G. Swan has died in action at 11:49 pm on the evening of the 18__th__/12__th__/2014 while an enemy force shot him while he was providing cover fire so his squad could return to safety. His body has been recovered safely and he will receive a full military service due to his death._

_Sincerely,_

_Jason Leason._

_Jason Leason._

_United States Military._

_International Military Branch of Paris._

I nodded to myself, it wasn't the first time I had read a letter of… regret from the military. I sighed putting it aside and reading though the rest of the papers, dates, times, and all that saying about dad's funeral, death and all the rest of it. I sighed everything seemed to be in order, I rubbed a hand roughly over my face, mussing my hair up I was sure but I couldn't find it in myself to care. I stuck my hand in the thick envelop to double check I got everything and my fingers brushed against a piece of cool metal I up ended it and saw dad's dog-tag fall out. I sucked in another breath and peered at it, reading his name and all his other credentials on it, I slipped it over my head, feeling the cool metal against my skin. I sat the papers on my desk and looked at my hands, they were shaking. I looked in the mirror and saw my reflection look back… in that minute that felt like hours I wasn't even sure that it was me looking back, that girl looking back seemed like a stranger…

**Sam's Pov**

I walked in from patrol, grabbing the mail as I walked in, flicking through as I walked to see what mail we got and what not. I peered at a large thick envelop that was reasonably heavy, I looked at who it was mailed to and saw that it was addressed to Bella. I walked through the front door and leaned against the door jamb for a minute just… watching my family interact. My gaze settled on Bella. I didn't know her all that well but when Charlie Swan called asking if she could stay with Emily and I for a while I found myself saying yes before I really even took notice what he was asking. I had a great deal of respect for Charles Swan, he pulled my father out of the rubble of a fallen building they had performed a mission on that had been bombed. A suicide extremist has brought the building down on them as they tried to reason with him to save some innocents. Charlie the tough bastard had gotten up without a scratch on him but my father has been hurt bad, he had a great big piece of pipe sticking through his middle and another piece through his left thigh. Charlie could have walked out that day without him but he didn't, he searched the rubble long after the sun had gone down and the rest of the team that was either dead or alive had returned to the base. He found dad in a bad way but dragged him out and down the road 5km until they could get a lift back to the base. My dad lived that day thanks to Charles Swan and his… commitment to others along with his love for my father. They had gone through training and the academy together, forging a brotherly bond deep within both of them. It tore dad apart when he had to retire from that area of the military because he couldn't fully recover from his injuries.

It was a few years later that he died from a heart attack, no one knows what caused it but mum said it was because of some of the awful things he saw catching up with him. Ever since then Charlie and I have been close… I guess I saw him as a link to my father and he saw me as a link to Joshua. I handed Bella the letter and watched as she got up and walked to her room, opting for a little more privacy I guessed.

"Hey Paul, you told her about us yet?" Jared asked with a mouth full of chicken

"No," He shook his head still looking from where she closed her door "I can't think of how to do it and plus… I think she is going through a tough time at the moment."

"Why do you say that?" I asked, frowning, I knew he had been spending some nights with her but I figured it was just the imprint calling them to be together

He shrugged picking up a drumstick "Just got a feeling you know?"

We kept eating our way through breakfast, Embry and Jake switching patrol with Quil and Leah when Emily said;

"Bella's been gone an awful long while… do you think I should go check on her?"

"Nah," I shook my head smiling before peering at Paul "What do you think?"

"Leave her be," Paul nodded "If she needs me I will know."

I felt uneasy, I couldn't hear all that much from Bella's room and I could tell that Paul was lying, his face was… uneasy as well. I heard the door crack open and I looked at Bella in shock. She was pale under her tan skin, she looked like she has aged ten years in a matter minutes, her hands were shaking and her hair was dishevelled along with her shoulders slumping forwards like she did when she was uneasy not to mention the sweat breaking out on her face and neck sticking her hair that escaped her pony tail to it. Her knees sagged and Paul lunged forwards faster than the speed of light, grabbing her just before she hit the ground, Paul pulling her onto his lap as he hit the ground with his own ass. My eyes focused on her, trying to read what was wrong with her when they focused on a chain around her neck that wasn't there before. I walked forwards quickly watching as Paul talked to her, trying to coax some words out of her, anything to let us know that she was okay. Her eyes were open and staring at us as if in confusion… like she didn't quite understand what we were saying or doing. I picked up the chain and pulled it out from her shirt gingerly making sure not to brush anything and grabbed the charm on the end of it, my hands breaking out in a sweat as I looked at it before reading what was printed on it, knowing what it was but _not _wanting to know what it would say… what her having it around her neck meant. It read;

_Swan._

_Charles G._

_17000484 – T40 – 41 – A_

_B pos._

_Anglican._

It was his dog-tag. He was dead. I felt my eyes catch Bella's and stare into them, trying to reach her fading self, trying to tell her that it would be okay but I knew then staring into her unfocused eyes that... it might not. I was lying myself and her, and I knew she could read me like a magazine and she knew it too.

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><p><strong>Thank you Lannah and Sjorty for reviewing my fanfic and giving me some much needed feed back so I could improve my writing and myself. Once again please review so i know if you don't understand something and i need to clarify it, i will do it. I don't own twilight, only my ideas and my version of Bella and the wolf pack. Thanks, Paul is all mine ladies.<strong>


	4. A long night and the next day

Chapter 4

Previously

_It was his dog-tag. He was dead. I felt my eyes catch Bella's and stare into them, trying to reach her fading self, trying to tell her that it would be okay but I knew then staring into her unfocused eyes that... it might not. I was lying myself and her, and I knew she could read me like a magazine and she knew it too._

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><p><em><span>Bella's Pov<span>_

I woke with a start, steady heat seeping into my bones from my back and right side, I knew it was Paul without even rolling over to look at him. I peered at the clock and found it early in the morning, 2:35am, sighing I touched the metal at my throat. I was losing myself in slowly with my thoughts when I felt a heated hand move to my ass, I snorted, it wasn't the first time it had gone wandering. That hand held my whole attention now, with a jolt I realised that my life was here now… with Paul, with Sam and Emily… with their whole crazy, dysfunctional family. I turned my head so I was face to face with Paul's sleeping one, I smiled at his soft expression, his sharp features softened by sleep. I don't know how long I was staring but soon enough he opened his eyes, in that moment when he opened his eyes, sky blue meeting stormy grey, I felt like I could see into his soul. I could see a time long ago when Paul hadn't had the weight of the world dropped on his shoulders, a little boy laughing as his mother and father chased him around the yard, laughing at his joy. He shut his eyes momentarily before he just pressed his forehead to mine, a soft smile decorating his face.

"You okay, chickie?" he rasped, his voice rough with sleep

I paused, thinking about my answer carefully "Yeah," I nodded slightly against his forehead "I need to move on… I know dad is at peace now and I am… I am happy he is finally with mum, I just need to accept what happened and move on."

"But what about you?" He rasped, eyes flashing open and boring into mine once again "You always talk about your dad… that you are happy for him, right now in this moment, what are you feeling?"

I squirmed uncomfortably under his unwavering gaze "Honestly…" I trailed off, feeling the uncomfortable burn of tears behind my eyes "Destroyed… he was my dad… he was all that I had left, with mum gone and them not speaking to their parents… I'm alone, just… left to fend for myself." I felt my tears finally drip from my eyes, Paul's eyes flashing in concern

"Hey now," He hushed me, wiping my tears away with his calloused thumbs "None of that, little girl."

"Who you calling little?" I hiccuped at a weak attempt of humor, a wet sniffle coming from my nose

"You, little girl," Paul mumbled wiping my face again, frowning at me "Now I didn't know you dad but I know for a fact that he wouldn't want you to be miserable. Grieve, it's normal, you lost your last living blood family member… you should be hurting I would call you weird if you weren't."

We laid there for a while, me just calming down and catching my breath, Paul recovering from the girlie moment I just had I was guessing. I snorted at myself, I'm sure I looked really _really _attractive at the moment, red puffy eyes, snot visible in my nose canals I was guessing, tear tracks, the whole ten yards.

Paul said something so quiet I didn't really know if he _actually _said anything but I figured I better ask anyway.

"You say something?"

"Yeah," he said a bit louder to himself now, eyes distant "I said… I could be you family, if you wanted me."

I felt my breathing crease to exist, all the remaining air left me in a soft 'whoosh.'

"I mean…" He trailed off, scratching the back of his neck now "Sam and Emily love you like a sister, as do the rest of the guys… Leah finally stopped being such a bitch with you around, Seth shuts up and listens sometimes now which is… wow. And me, well… you changed me, for the better. You made me see how much of a _tool _I was being before, it's not _cool _to get pissed and hurt other people… it's not _cool _to just drink all weekend and get in fights, you made me see that life at home, right here is cool and worth sticking around for. That just the normal stuff can be fun and exciting... I mean who knew that playing _monopoly _can be so _frustrating _but so fun?"

**Paul's Pov**

"Yeah," I whispered a bit louder to myself, I knew I was distant but I needed to be for this… I can't… I just… expressing emotions for me with how I grew up is still a little beyond me "I said… I could be you family, if you wanted me."

I watched her carefully, hoping to the God's that I hadn't crossed some sort of line in her books. I mean she had been here for what… a little under two months and it felt like if she left now I would die. I heard a soft 'whoosh.' emit itself from her and I bit my lip, I back peddled, hoping to undo some of the damage I just created.

"I mean…" I trailed off, scratching the back of my neck now in discomfort, I wasn't good at emotions and shit "Sam and Emily love you like a sister, as do the rest of the guys… Leah finally stopped being such a bitch with you around, Seth shuts up and listens sometimes now which is… wow. And me, well… you changed me, for the better. You made me see how much of a _tool _I was being before, it's not _cool _to get pissed and hurt other people… it's not _cool _to just drink all weekend and get in fights, you made me see that life at home, right here is cool and worth sticking around for. That just the normal stuff can be fun and exciting... I mean who knew that playing _monopoly _can be so _frustrating _but so fun?"

I shut my eyes almost knowing that I had screwed up when I felt pressure on my lips, I opened my eyes in shock and saw her looking back, our lips connected. She pulled back and blushed but I followed her, pressing my lips back to hers, I felt her lips curve into a faint smile and both our eyes fluttered closed. it wasn't a forceful kiss, or a passionate one… neither of us wanted that. It was reassuring, letting the other know that we were here… and I knew she was here to stay, I just hoped that she knew I wouldn't leave her, not ever. We pulled back and she just burrowed her body forwards into mine, I smiled and wrapped my arms around her torso, bringing her closer. That's how we fell asleep, clinging to each other, knowing that she needed it, to know that I would never her leave… she had known too much loss in her lifetime and I would be damned if I left her of if she left me.

_Bella's Pov_

I woke for the second time that morning but this time to an empty bed, I felt my heart throb painfully for a second but I knew Paul wouldn't be too far… I could feel it. I knew there was something… odd about them, stuff didn't make sense. Their sheer _heat, _their physical structure I mean no normal seventeen year old that that _built, _they could hear things from such a distance it was impossible for me or any other person I was sure. I wouldn't push them, they would tell me in their own time, mind you I didn't have time to worry about their qualities, I let out a shuddering sob… I had a funeral to arrange. I took a minute to compose myself, I pulled myself from the bed, grabbed my towel and walked to the bathroom not encountering anyone on the way and I was glad. I washed myself quickly and shut the water off, pulling my towel down from the glass walls of the shower and patted my face dry before wrapping my body in the soft fibres. I snorted; I assumed not many people did that. Ever since I hit my teen years though I started doing it, I hated stepping out of the shower and feeling the cool air freeze your body after showering and getting the shower mat drenched… I dunno why but that bothered me. I padded to my room with my towel fixed firmly around myself, that's another thing I also did. I couldn't get how people got dressed in the bathroom straight after showering. I mean you are all steamy and if you are trying to put clothes on it can be a pain with them sticking to you and everything. I know I am rambling but I guess I am doing it on purpose, to occupy my mind away from the through of all the phone calls I was going to have to make to organise things… it would be a nightmare, literally and metaphorically.

I took my time getting ready, selecting comfy but nice clothes to wear, dabbing a bit of makeup on to hide some of the… evidence of my melt down yesterday. Taking a deep breath I stepped out into the kitchen, well aware of all the looks I was receiving.

"Hi guys." I whispered, trying out a smile although I was sure it looked like a grimace

I didn't get two more steps before I was wrapped up in Sam's warm embrace; I smiled and circled my arms around him, resting my cheek on his chest. "I'm sorry," he whispered into my hair "… He was a great man I'm sure you know."

I pulled back and shot a warn smile up at him before I continued onto the table, noticing the cautious looks, it rubbed my wrong that they were so… subdued because of me.

"Don't treat my any different… because of…" I whispered, watching as all of them squirmed in their seats "Because of… you know…"

They all nodded and I smiled at the roar of noise that seemed to take up the whole kitchen area, I felt… somewhat normal again before I picked the phone up and started making calls and arrangements.

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><p><strong>Hi guys, thanks for waiting (Hopefully) I'm sorry I took so long to update but you know... life gets hectic sometimes. I hoped you liked it, but if you found it boring i can assure the next 5 or so chapters will really be heating up with some awesome action with Paul, Bella and a scary reminder of her past. Please please please update, if you have any questions leave them in the reviews and I will answer them in the next installment. Let me know your likes and dislikes so i can change it if need be! Thanks, Paul is all mine lades.<strong>


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